"S"

My week, this week, has been brought to me courtesy of the letter “S”. The whole week.

So happy that I left art paper 2, then I'll be done with my SECONDARY LIFE!

So happy that I'm going to migrate to Singapore.

So happy that I'm going to stay with my boyfriend.

So fucking happy that my mom had approved me to move in to Singapore.

Yet still........

So sad that I'm going far away from my home. -although I'm not that close to my family-

So sad that I'm going to miss all my fucking close friends. Jade, Li May, Siow thong, Li ying, Alvina, Zack, Desmond, Brandon, Shue king, Ah Yeang, Eng Ann.

So sad that I've to wash my own undergarments, not my mom....-washing machine-

So sad that because I actually start to miss you people, you people seriously rocks!

Ummm, little bit of heaven & little bit of hell...

Behind the smile.

There are times when life reaches me out, strokes my hand, smacks me across the face, and then opens my eyes.

A couple of days ago, I decided to expose my relationship between Darren Lee & I. I know it was a bad decision for now because I'm having my SPM like two days time. It's pretty stupid to expose it out now. I was crying so bad last night that My eyes were pretty swollen this morning & it looks like someone had punch me in the eyes. -just saying-

Ohh welll, I can't even study a shit because nothing goes into my head. My mom will be pretty upset when my results is out. I'm not those study type of girl, I'm more of party hard type of girl. I'm pretty sure some of you study like hell which is like 24/7? & I'm fucking relax listening songs & daydreaming all day long. Okay, I did tried studying but nothing works. I stopped my tuition few months ago when I start to realise I catch no balls at tuition. so what's the point of spending money on paying those fees? Bullshit.

Ohh well, that's all for this post. I'm fucking ill t(-.-t)

 PS : I Love You.

The smell of rain is such a beautiful thing.

It's been raining all day long. I was as down as the sky, guess it was meant to be like this. Oh well, ironic isn't it? What the hell I was thinking all this time? There's no point getting so upset because life still have to goes on. I bet most of the people hated the way I talk or act, and do you think I fucking care? You people only see what I choose to show. So, don't fucking judge me when you people know nothing but just a piece of blank paper. I'm getting so frustrated over all this shits. Come on! My SPM are around the corner & what the hell do you expect from me? Just SHUT THE FUCK UP. & Today I need to fucking stay up late for tomorrow exams. So, don't fucking stress me up.

Don't waste your time thinking about yesterday.. You might miss your chance to grab tomorrow

Then sometimes the clouds come down, the rain falls, and the darkness seeps into that side view you have, that cloudy corner of your eye periphery. The world is a giant rainslicked smudge, the air you breathe hangs in the air, and the world smells of rising bread dough and disappointment. You put one foot in front of the other -anything else is just crazy- and yet you are consistently twenty steps short of where you need to be. Doom and gloom. Gloom and doom.

Japanese Store highlight: Yumetenbo

HELLO!

YUMETENBO is a Japanese store online that I have been curious to make a purchase from since they have uber CUTE clothes! So I wanted to share with you some of the items that have caught my eyes~ :)

They have tons of Mint colored items but unfortunately seems like mint shade are super popular so all the mint shaded clothing that I want are sold out in my size D;

I checked up and seems like they ship overseas now!!
Here are some items that I like

SPM TRIALS

Will be inactive for this month due to my Spm Trials. Sorry.

Narcissism

I believe everyone thought that time passed really quickly. But in fact, I thought it felt like 5 years gathered into one. Or maybe it's so fast that I thought some stuff that happened in 2012 are actually in 2011. Okay, mind blown. I don't know what I'm trying to say but still, 2012 is actually the year that I improved/changed the most. Like, in terms of looks and the way I speak or portray myself on the internet & in real life. I thought I was awesome UNTIL I read how I speak half a year ago. Not that I'm awesome now, but you CANNOT deny how much more awesome I had become in 2012.

There's a few stuff that I always wanted to make it happen. basically, some things kind of got me to blog this so here I am. Have you gotten what you want? No, I haven't. -.-
 Okay, so here are my new stuff that I want to make it happen.

 1) I need to see four digits in my bank.
 Okay because I had been spending like some whore now and I really need to feed my bank otherwise it'll be as skinny as me. -Wait no, it's skinnier than me now, dafuq- I'm gonna work work work!

 2) Get a hair sponsor.
 I want a HAIR SPONSOR so bad. Look at my grass hair...I guess grasses are even softer. My hair can officially compete with metal wires. I doubt metal wires have any split ends :( So yeah, I want to get a hair sponsor! -Frigging Badly-

 3) Increase blog hits.
 Okay this should totally be on the TOP of this entire list because that's what it matters. Like without hits, who wants to give me nice hair right? Yeah.

 According to astronomy when you wish upon a star you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead, just like your dreams.
Okay, Mind blown.

That's all. Good Nights :)

Everybody hurts.

I don't pretend to be normal. I mean, I pretend, but deep down I think I got it that I’m a little off-kilter. I’ve been under huge pressure lately, and so took leave today. I have been quiet, in part because I’ve not much to say but largely because my bloody body condition isn't that good recently. I felt like vomiting all the times. I'M NOT PREGNANT.

 There are moments in time which are so exquisite that it may border the space between utter joy and actual pain. Joy for the opportunity to bathe in it, and despair that it may be a one off. These moments are hard to predict but when they happen, you come away with part of your heart on the sticky side of the Band-Aid.

NERVOUS

I'm multitasking now, watching Dato Lee Chong Wei vs Lin Dan and blogging in another side.I think the whole Malaysia is watching and hoping Dato Lee Chong Wei to bring us back our very first olympic gold medal.-PrayHard- Both players are very powerful so it's a really really exciting match.The score is so close omgosh but I got faith in Dato Lee!!!

D'unexpected

Hey, I'm back again! Last week was the most terrible week in July. My schedule was pretty full due to the work, tuition, revision and etc. My boss had a roadshow at carrefour at Bukit Rimau. It wasn't that bad but my legs are aching like nobody else. I had to handle alone at shop & my boss and her other friends at carrefour fighting for their sales. At night I had to head to carrefour to help them because there's too much of people. Here's some picture.

CLOTHING ; 50% discount

BOOKS & CANVAS

                                                        CLOTHING ; No 50% discount.

                                                     

Toys & arts stuff.

Overview

Kay, I find this small lil girl that came for painting class was frigging cool. Omgosh, She's so cute & take a look at her hair. 

My monster is sick, I guess so. He doesn't seems well and he move less & like some typical crazy monster dropping from the top of the cage. Argh.

So cute right? He was looking at me with this kind of face man. So frigging cute!

Had Chatime & Dingtea recently. Thanks to the "kind guy" that willing to fetch me to go tuition & fetch me home because sitting the tuition transportation I can die man. It's too bumpy & I've car sick. It only make it worst. By the time I reach tuition, I don't have the mood to study instead have the mood to puke -.-

 It's weird for me to bring this up. This guy chase me almost one year or more yet he didn't get a place in my heart no matter how hard he tried, now he give up. Six or more guys cried in front of me begging me not to leave them & some even say I'm fucking heartless. Yeah, I am a heartless bitch. You guys suppose to hate me, I understand. 2days ago one of the guy cried in front of me tru skype, I still remembered him saying I'm heartless. For that second I feel that I'm such a bad bitch. I'm such a bitch.


Okay, I'm so fucking sleepy right now. It's going to be 4.00a.m. here.
Well, I'll just end here. Nights people. Sweet dream! 

If I'm in the middle

I’ve been quiet because of being crazy busy with some things I can talk about, and some I can’t. We have something going on that has taken a fair amount of my mental capacity lately, and I can’t write about it, not right now. It’s fine – I’m okay.

 My entire life has been spent as a pessimist. In everything I’ve done or said, in every competition or option, in every element where hope was a possibility, I erred to the negative. Not because I prefer being a grouch but because damage limitation was easier for me if I didn’t have very far to fall. Aim high, expect low, and then when the inevitable failure happened it didn’t hurt as badly.

Cynical and depressing, but it made for a few joyous successes.

Typical Mind

I think a lot about things, as you know that I can’t do anything in halves, I have to sit and think about them in multiples of five. What I'm sharing here is representative of my life, but it can’t be my life. It can’t be everything, I did that before and crossed boundaries I should not have crossed. I write the reality, the truth, what happens to me and what I think, feel and do. But I can’t capture every single detail, because that’s known as “obsessive”. It can also be classified as “boring”. Life gets that way.

Perplexed

A second opinion may not be exactly what I'm looking for. What for me is flawless and sublime might be unremarkable to those whose opinions matter to me. They might find the object of  my opinions quaint, lackluster, or, worst of all, not worth commenting upon. These things can be borne somewhat when the knowledge is mine alone. This is why I must carefully consider with whom I'm going to share my likes and my dislikes. Or anything, really. Take a good, long look before speaking.

Cam whore

Listening ; Happy ending - Mika


Having bloody mood swing out of no where. I was starving for MacDonald & Pizza Hut the whole entire afternoon. & I was lucky enough that someone is willing to deliver it to my house, thanks to Raymond & Ah Yeang for the MacDonald. So, recently I feel that I got so damn bloody choosy over my meals which like I rather starve than eating the food that people bought / mom cook. I'm such a bad girl. -bitchslap-






So, I was so frigging bored that I makeup & start to cam whore with my Digital camera, lame shit. I think my bestfriend was suppose to do his JAVA but due to my stubbornness, he need to help me to edit my damn picture, not the one on top of this post. IT'S THE BANNER RIGHT ON TOP. I think he had to bare with my expectation which is quite high, hah. He got sort of frustrated saying I was frigging 'mafan' which is troublesome, lol. Thanks anyways, hearts yo! ❤

Randomness

I was so bored that I switch on my desktop to see what can I do instead of making myself feel like a dead fish. I found this very very old picture while I was clicking here & there. I think this picture took it like half a year ago or more. I miss every single stuff that we had been tru although now we're going our own ways to get a better life because we know that this isn't working out anymore or should I say I'm the only one that think this way. It's not easy to end a two years plus relationship but when you know there's no point being together,  then you'll have to move on. At times, I really miss him badly but for now things changed.



A lot of people question me ; why do you act like it doesn't hurt?

Actually it does hurt, a lot. I don't know why but I think I knew this would happen someday ever since the day he left me. For me, a relationship won't last long if that couple broke up a few times or even once. It wasn't easy & it wasn't that hard. ACT is just another common routine for me in school life. Honestly, I'm sad doesn't mean I have to let everyone know by showing my bloody shit sad face right? I think smiling looks better than the bloody sad face. FACTS : smiling doesn't mean I'm happy. It often means I'm hurt, acting happy to pretend that I'm okay. Furthermore, I don't think it's a good news to spread around cause you know one by one pass around & people add few words in & stories change & also cause I really hate rumour. So, I think smiling will do.

That's all for today, bye. :)


smile always.

One month m(-.-m)

Hello stalker, I'm still frigging awake at this hour -zombielook- Everything seems pretty fine today since I've been enjoying my day at Singapore. The most memorable month day I guess. Today went and shop for jade's fav.shoes at Zara but it seems there's nothing nice except for the T-shirt. I might buy it before I leave Singapore tomorrow, hopefully there's enough time for me hahah. Thanks to somebody that bought me sticky prepared the whole trip in order to get rid of the boredom :p But seriously, my bloody leg hurts like nobody else because I spend most of my energy walking around like boss t(-.-t)

 I think that's all for today, bye.

Sexy belly.

Yo peeps. Trials is around the corner yet I still can relax myself not studying at all as if SPM it's not important to me anymore, WHATTHEFUCK. Recently I've got a belly piercing & a lot of people had been asking me is it pain or how does it feels like or some even asked me is it costly? Basically, the pain it's worth more than the price, RM75. So, how does it feels like? I got quite dizzy at first & whole body was trembling but after 5 mins I was fine with it. I think that's all I want to blog about since this question keep going round & round. byebye :p

Things that people will never understand

Sometimes in life, you end up falling for the person you thought you never would have feelings for.

The unknown mess

Hey people! It's been awhile that I didn't update myself. So, recently I've been so fucking stress that I wanna smash everything around me. Exam is around the corner & yet I've not even start studying. Bloody hell, I think I'm in the mess which I can't tidy up by myself. I don't even know what I want & need. I get frustrated over every single shit I do. That's the feeling when I wanna push everything aside. I don't know who I am anymore. Can someone lead me? I'm lost at the moment, seriously.

.

lol, hi? it's been awhile I've not updated my blog. I usually update it when I'm sad or something that breaks me down. Sort of like a emo blog. I don't like people judging me after all, all they know was my fucking name! You guys so free issit? Why not do something else huh? so free to be hypocrite! Excuse me, SHUT THE FUCK UP man.